The idle ramblings of a Jack of some trades, Master of none

Apr 23, 2007

Lara's Theme

Not sure if anyone has heard of Brian Lara. His main claim to fame, of course, is that he was born on exactly the same day as I.

For some reason, on account of a somewhat exaggerated aptitude for clubbing a hard ball with a willow wand, he has been named "The Prince of Port-of-Spain".

With the same modesty that led me to name myself after the most peerless of the Eldar, I present below some of the other Laras who share a connection with me.

Lara Veronin is a minor talent in Taiwan. Her troupe is called 南拳媽媽, and they purvey a strange admixture of rap and R&B in the name of music. She was born exactly 19 years after my advent, which is the only reason, of course, that she has any raison d'être.

Lara Flynn Boyle, an anorexic bimbette, all angular shoulders and jaws, strutted her stuff as the villainous alien Serleena in the film Men in Black II, and somehow managed to ensnare that epitome of piety and good taste, Jack Nicholson. Thankfully, she doesn't share my birthday, but one can weave a set of associations from her to David Suchet, who in fact does.

Lara Croft, the aristocratic destroyer of priceless antiquities and arch-vandal of archaeology, hails from Wimbledon, where yours truly has his humble abode. A baboon-lipped serial adopter of unsuspecting infants, Angelina Jolie, and a wholesome ex-clothing-assistant-atTopshop, Karima Adebibe have variously role-played this woman, much to the frenzied onanism of millions of gamesters and movie-goers.

At this point I find I have lost all interest in this posting. Good night.


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